February 16, 2011

5 ways to quit & do what you love

Since my international fanbase has grown a bit and I've had some requests about writing in English, here it goes: my first English blog post!

5 ways to quit & do what you love!

#1

Way to quit: Smack your boss in the face

Way to do what you love: Move to your dream location.

#2

Way to quit: Strip down to your skivvies and start dancing to “Thriller” in a human resources meeting about sexual harrasment in the workplace.

Way to do what you love: Make an activity your livelihood.

#3

Way to quit: Stage your own death (by bagel knife) in the coffee room using ketchup as a prop, be sure to stumble out the front door and leave a “bloody” trail of ketchup from your office to the nearest large body of water so they’ll never “find the body”. Note: you may need several bottles of ketchup and a bus ticket if you are not immediately near water

Way to do what you love: Use a God given gift.

#4

Way to quit. Use the highest paid executive in your firm’s fax machine to send pieces of toast to the Boston office, if it’s doesn’t work the first time – add jelly.

Way to do what you love. Review it.

#5

Way to quit: In an effort to save on rent, move into your office cubicle and shower in water fountain using your latest memos as wash cloths.

Way to do what you love: Solve other people’s problem.

16 comments:

  1. I want to see that "Thriller" dance. It would be hilarious.
    Your english is good btw

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  2. Haha awesome post, and you're English is really good dude.

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  3. I love #3. People seem to forget how deadly bagel knifes can be.

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  4. Your english is very good! I'd love to smack my boss in the face haha that would be epic

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  5. Sounds like good advice. Had a few bosses i've wanted to slap in the face. To do what I want to do (vet) I have to get back to university though, and sadly that means staying in England as I can't afford anywhere else.

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  6. damn only if i had read this about a month ago i could have done one of those and quit instead of getting laid off :(

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  7. It'll be hard to do what I love if I'm in jail for battery lol Good advice though

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  8. YES!

    you should print this and stick it to the wall of some sad cubicle office

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  9. I think #2 will get you arrested along with the firing.

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  10. "Note: you may need several bottles of ketchup and a bus ticket if you are not immediately near water"

    hahah this one cracked me up!

    good job man!

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  11. I wish people would heed this advise!

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  12. I've actually staged my own death before. Steak knife, not bagel.

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  13. heres a way to quit, give your boss the finger, tell him to F**K OFF and just walk out, just that easy

    but i don't recommend it if you need a reference

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